27 Aug 2015

Urine Trouble: Squirting, Paleo, And Your Pet Bullshit

As a young lad I may have watched an adult film or two on VHS tape. I may in fact have worn out the remote control on the VCR from such viewings. I remember one scene where an orgasmic woman hosed down the set like it was on fire, and

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dog and bone
04 Aug 2015

Your Dog Will Eat You (And Cannabis Won’t Cure Cancer)

In autumn 1994 Florida resident Diane Duyser had a religious experience with her lunch. You are likely familiar with the story, because the image of the Virgin Mary burned into her grilled cheese sandwich became part of pop culture. It is a convincing representation of a woman’s face in white

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26 Jul 2015

Dear Yahoo: Why Did You Decide to Start Killing Children?

Photo credit: iStock via Yahoo.  Dear terminator of the incompetent at Yahoo: You have some work to do. A head needs to roll. A slip of pink needs delivering. A boot needs to be given. A pair of buttocks need to be shown a door. Which posterior it is in

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22 Jul 2015

John Burk: Fitness Douchebag of the Week

“You are a disgusting fat body, Private Pyle!” The drill sergeant in Full Metal Jacket spoke those words, and we all know how things turned out for those two characters. Fictionalized bathroom murder-suicides aside, when you have a captive audience of enlisted men who have no choice but to follow

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